Starting Never Again
by when-pigwidgeon-flies
Summary: A post-Cedric story about Cho. I'm not quite sure how it's going to end up, though, so I acn't quite summarize.


CHO  
  
She was sitting on the bench, lost to her thoughts. The trees on the grounds were tall and proud. Her brown eyes scanned them and remembered how at night, those same trees looked dark and twisted, their branches reaching out like fingers yearning to grab her away from him, whenever she was out here on the bench with... She closed her almond eyes painfully and wistfully and sighed a breath that seemed to empty out her whole soul. That was how she felt ever since he died, a hollow feeling that wouldn't go away and seemed to keep eating her from the inside out. A wave of icy pain trickled from her head an d shuddered through her body. She shivered even though it was reasonably warm out. She always felt this way evry time she thought of... She sighed again and looked at the spot where Cedric would have been had he been alive. She would have been leaning oback on his shoulder, and to gether they would count the stars or talk about something. She remembered the way his light eyes glistened and how his jet black hair would fall down about his soft, caring face. But the absence of his arm at her waist and only air to lean on, reliving this moment seemed hard. Her hand hovered over the spot where he used to sit. "Cho! Where are you?!" several voices called, probing through the bushes around the bench. Her friends peeked through. "You alright?" asked Carmen, a green-eyed girl with thick black curls, and a wicked grin. But that grin was non-existant as her voice and face carried a sense of apprehension. " yeah, i'm fine." This seemed to be the only words she could bear to utter lately. "Let's go back to the catsle before lunch is over." Carmen suggested. Cho only shrugged and got up from her spot on the bench. Her friends followed her towards the castle tentatively, but it was still too clse for comfort. "you're still not on about Cedric, are you?" asked Anne, a freckled face blonde that seemed to be prone to frustrating Cho. "Shut up, of course she is." snapped Carmen. As Carmen tried to explain to Anne the importance of keep her big mouth shut if she was going to say something as insulting as that, Cho took the opportunity to glance over at Miranda, who was quiet all this time. She said nothing, but just stared back, with her sad, green eyes. There seemed to be an understanding beyond words. Miranda was Cho's closest friend and except for Cedric, she was the one that Cho could open up to and be sure that it wouldn't turn into gossip, like with Cho's other "friends", as Cho learned the hard way. Carmen cared enough, but wasn't so quiet about things, she was too outgoing. Anne was-too-annoyingly- superficial, but she stayed around cho and her friends because she didn't seem to have much else to do. Cho started.There, flickered in the redhead's eyes, somethign that wasn't ever there before. Cho couldn't put her finger on it, an dtoo soon, miranda looked away. They reached the entrance hall an dwent into the great hall for lunch.  
  
"Cho, you gonna eat something already? You can't just starve yourself you know." Carmen cut into her thoughts. Cho looked up. A number of people were staring at her. She reached for a sandwhich and nibbled on it. On her tongue, it tasted like ashes. She couldn't eat very much lately, ever since he died. Even during this summer prior her sixth year she went without food save a few bites of her forgotten meals. This was always because she was thinking of him. She was doing so at that moment, when everyone was busy eating up their lunches, oblivious to how deep his death had affected her. How could she think of anything else? Her life had been turned upside down after the incident. Her marks had gone down, she had lost a lot of weight, and some friends, the casual ones taht only liked her when she was popular, but turned away when she went with Cedric to the Yule ball last Christmas. She had given up a lot being with him, but had gained so much else along with it.Now, however, she felt like she had lost more than ever. "Chooo... are you gonna eat that?" Cho looked up and saw Anne staring at her quite forgotten sandwiche. "No,"Cho shrugged while wondering what Anne ever thought about other than money, clothes, and food. It wa stime for her next class, Defence against the Dark Arts. She struggled to pick herself up and trudged up the staircase. Someone walked past her and acccidentally knocked her school bag off. Her books and supplies flew out of her bag and cascaded down the stairs. It was Harry Potter, the one who dragged Cedric out of that maze. "Sorry," he said, "let me help you with that." He helped her gather all her books and put them back in her bag, as the satirs emptied of students hurrying to theif classes. "Thanks" whispered Cho and turned to leave. "Wait!" he said, going three shades of red. "I,er, didn't have the chance to tell you, but I'm really sorry about Cedric. He was..." he stopped an dhastily added,"I don't want to remind you of anything that would make you sad." "I already am. There isn't much worse anyone can do."she smiled ironically. She was touched at how he respected her feelings, but didn't think much of it. He nodded and turned away. "I'll see you later then,"he said, starting to walk to his own class. "Harry?" He was at the top of the stairs by now. "Thanks." Said Cho.  
She entered the classroom and hurriedly muttered an apology Professor Figg explaining that her bag fell open. The professor nodded, and as all eyes followed her, Cho slipped into her seat beside Carmen. "As you all know, the dark arts had led many to explore all that can be done to a human's body and soul." Figg started. Cho's shoulders sagged. The dark arts. He who must not be named, You know who, and for those who even dared to utter his name, Voldemort. He was the one who killed Cedric, or so Dumbledore said, but... what if it was Harry? He was there, but what if... he was aparseltongue, and was abit erratic... the image of harry saying "sorry" to her on the staircase pushed itself through her thoughts. No, he's too nice. He couldn't have- "Will you pay attention, Miss Chang?" Cho looked up at Figg. She looked down in embarassment. Figg continued her lesson, sounding very much like Professor Binns and his ongoing lectures. Cho couldn't focus. Her thoughts drifted back to Cedric, and surprisingly, Harry. "Again, Cho! Are you alright?" "Er- I'm alright." She replied, snapping back to reality for the umpteenth time that day. Class ended then, and cho was releived. She now had History of Magic, where it seemed only fair for students to fall asleep in that class. She had never done so before, but this class let her mind wander without interruption.  
Seated in the back, Cho looked out the window. This particular window framed the beanch that she was out on that afternoon, which was against the other wall. Class started. She could barely recognise the droning of Professor Binns in the background when she lay her head down and dozed off. She was running, running and someone was right beside her, running with her. She was heading to somewhere she didn't know, but only kneew that she had to get ther somehow. All that she could see of the person right beside her were their green eyes. Suddenly, she was on a broom, zooming towards her destination, but thenn something happened.a bludger or some kind of blow crashed into her right side. The impact took her by surprise and knocked her off her broom. Ther person next to her called her name. "Cho! Cho!" she woke up and turned to her right where there sat Anne poking her in the ribs and whining out her name. "Can I borrow a sickle?" "ugh." Cho was digusted. " no" she said, and laid her head back on the desk. "but why? I know you have a sickle" "fine. Here." Cho reached into her robes and in her jean pocket and retrieved a sickle an dgave it to Anne."Just stop bugging me, okay?"  
  
Dinner was yet another long and boring affair, which consisted of Carmen pushing Cho's shepherd pie towards her in an effort to get her to eat and Anne asking her if she could have her leftovers. Miranda was still so quiet, and it was beginning to perturb Cho, and she couldn't figure out why. She resolved to ask her later when no one else was around. Cho suddenly walked out of the Great Hall in a daze and found herself heading out of the castle towards her and Cedric's bench again. It was alomst dark out, but she could see well using the light from the windows on the castle wall she walked against. She sat down and closed her eyes. " cedric...." she whispered,"where are you?" She heard a voice in the bushes to her left. It was... Harry. 


End file.
